Friday, May 4, 2012

The Avengers


The Avengers
Loki: "I have an army!"
Tony Stark: "And we have the Hulk!"


Clearly difficult to judge a movie that made you laugh so hard. But if necessary will snatch even a few smiles (but then you feel ashamed as a thief, because much prefer laughing watching Dr. House). Oh, I'm all wrong: now that I pulled out this comparison creepy, think that The Avengers by Joss Whedon, the most awaited film of the year (excluding the Hobbit, with the load of expectations that he brings with him deserves to compete in a category separately) is a crap era, intended only for an audience of lobotomized ready to sneer at the first tit / poo / bum / fart to appear on the screen.



The Avengers
Far from it. The Avengers have a script so clean and free of vulgarity that should be done studying at school instead of those awful books of elementary school, where you submit compelling adventure style "Marco eats ice cream" and "If I had not eaten ice cream, now I swim." Not only that beyond the absence of coarseness, is based on the witty dialogue as if passed through crossfire of Glossy Finish Powerball-Glasses. Stuff you would not believe, huh. Without exception for Iron Man, I do not remember so much hilarity in an action movie devoted to superheroes. In short, a sparkling comedy. Ah yes, there is Scarlett ... but not compute. He did not even calculated the scriptwriter, why should I?

The Avengers


But we analyze point by point our beloved heroes, and behold, I allergies: give them a vote. Type scorecard, because The Avengers are a bit 'the summation of all that have combined in the school year (i.e. in three thousand individual propionates Mamma Marvel prequel).

Strictly in alphabetical order.

Captain America: rating 7.5 - Sufficiency deserves it, for goodness sake, if only for thundering derived from seventy years of hibernation. For the purposes of the plot, we can safely say that the Avenger is useless, but it is far from unpleasant. Already so much, because someone like Chris Evans could afford to focus on many other much more obvious qualities of sympathy. Oh no, I am not talking about talent. However, Captain Rogers earns many points from the film where the protagonist was unique.

Captain America


Hulk: vote 8 - The Green Party friend relegated to a rather marginal role in the plot, but it stands out very soon the flight and, in scenes where it appears, works great. His last human alter ego, Mark Ruffalo, the character of Bruce Banner gives a good dose of intellectual clumsiness that goes perfectly with the definition given by the Agent Coulson: "a kind of Stephen Hawking." Ah, I forgot: he has earned applause a scene open to the public.

Hulk


Iron Man: rating 8.5 - Okay, the move is clear: the film relies entirely (or almost) on the charisma of Robert Downey Jr., who with the character of Tony Stark prepares a true masterpiece of charm and wit. The first not taken seriously and, therefore, a real machine churning beats. A feast for the eyes, ears, heart. Good thing they rescued Robert Downey Jr. from the darkest abyss of oblivion alcohol-toxic, because it hard to imagine a performer to his height. Save yourself the jokes on stature.

Iron Man


Hawkeye: vote 6 - Damn, another character that I wanted to know more. If nothing else, because to interpret it is Jeremy Renner, with whom I have killed enough patience to friends and relatives, because I consider it a fine acting. Ugly, but beautiful in this film there are already loose and packages. Why, though, having an interpreter available this poop, not exploit it better? Marvel Mystery.

Hawkeye


Thor: vote 7 - But look a little ', the most valuable piece of man the son of Odin is able to make well liked in this film. Sure, you can count a maximum of two terms, but what can you do ... it's still a god ... it is what blocks his facial expressions. And even strips, damn him. Yet, the blonde goddess seems to have learned a few things during his earlier stay on earth and the writers have felt compelled, rightly, to give him too a couple of tasty little jokes.

Thor


Black Widow: Vote 1 - No, come on, no joke ... I want you to think I'm mad at her because she is a girl, so let's vote 6. Of course, not party advantage is lower even Robert Downey Jr. (ok, I stop, I said nothing beats the stature); physique the role  aside, let's get together with low desire, from the scriptwriters, make you an important person in for the plot ... well, dear Natasha Romanoff / Scarlett Johansson, who do you claim? That gives you 10? Come on. Take your ass and your face buttery Easter Bunny away from this blog.

Black Widow


Very well. I finished and I can go to commend the immeasurable waste of visual effects with which this film dazzles and enchants you. Do not get me out of the sermon on the excess of visual FX, because I swear that I come to break your nose at home, one by one. My joy, vai to see The Avengers ... what do you expect to find on the screen? Two rooms and kitchen and a slew of close-ups? Mica're seeing Kiss me again, damn it! And thankfully, I add softly.

Hey, wait. I forgot something. Indeed, something. With a capital letter.

Loki: vote 8 - We'd keep me in a chat with the writers of The Avengers. I'm serious. As hoped to maintain the tension with a bad, if you've seen Thor, has only a bad spell for dark circles, just cannot understand it. Loki, Thor's brother and rival of our beloved team of Avengers, is mistreated, beaten and abused from beginning to end. In addition, there is a moment in which the public might fear the worst: the defeat is written in its DNA. And to think that is, between the protagonists, who lives most human of all the drama: it despises and is despised, before the eyes have its obvious inferiority to a good brother, blonder and more beautiful than ever. Among other things, Tom Hiddleston is so good that I would give him 110 summa cum laude with academic embrace and reverence, if only the writers had not come to the rescue. An unforgivable sin not to have built better, this bad.

Loki


Okay, but aside from this crew of misfits, what about this highly anticipated giocattolone? That, unfortunately, at least in part, to disappoint. Yes, because the subject turns you turn, already shaky from the premises. Okay, we know that Loki is pissed off; we know that yearning for a ransom ... but as it meets its 'allies'? Who am I? And above steps for Iron Man that has a super armor, and therefore it is as if traveling on a flying tank super hi-tech, steps Thor is a god and dent less than usual, wanting to walk well for Hulk is the only worthy, indeed, the name of the superhero, but the other three can actually fight a horde of enemies much larger and better equipped than they? And even assuming that they were superheroes of all docs ... well, you people are still six against six hundred. Okay, you say, but there will be the armed forces to back them. Here I stopped, because otherwise, you end up spat all over the plot, and frankly, I do not really want. I only say that there will, in a film that speaks of divine brothers came from the sky, the men with the magnetic plates installed in the center of the chest and the science of stars that become green behemoths, to make the story even more unlikely of protagonists. Moreover, in more than one occasion, the story slows down terribly, losing in a hide-the repartee between the Avengers can have fun but in the long run ends for grouting.



Beware, though: mine is far from being a rejection. Because, beyond some slowness and shallowness of the simplistic narrative mechanism, The Avengers and has a fun style that differs from all other films made in Marvel. Does not take himself seriously even in moments of drama, and this is its strength. Nothing-stale stench of emotion, no misplaced sentimentality. Would fall into a fatal gear, whereas each of the Avengers have a stormy past behind us and an unspecified quantity of skeletons in the closet, shadows in the soul and the like. The action rules over all, there are no time for existential questions. Thanks, Mr. Joss, because the lightness is not always a defect.

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